Ms. Wigglesworth just released her new guide for pets entitled "Coping With Hatred For Your Tail".

Why did the Girl Scouts change the name of Samoas to Caramel DeLites?

To any new readers: What the hell have you been doing with your life? Why hasn't my blog been a "staple" in your life? Without reading this, you surely have had an incomplete life. Without reading my blog, you surely haven't accomplished the necessary tasks for living. It makes me happy you have finally come around to realize the profound importance this blog has on your humanity. Let's celebrate.

Fluffin just finished a new novel entitled "I'll Eat Some Things That Don't Blend In With the Environment, and I'll Attack Others".

As a species, we must embrace the lessons we can take away from chicken.

My Aunt just finished a new novel entitled "Sweater Heat", edited by my mom.

Does anybody want join my new club called the "No Goonies Group"?

My friend just wrote a new novel entitled "Throw the Veggies Behind the Bench".

I feel kind of bad (only kind of) about singling-out Lance Armstrong.  Probably, just like Lance Armstrong has said, tons of cyclists use "performance-enhancers".  A lot of cyclists probably suck.  This doesn't change the fact he exploited cancer to build a business foundation, and to make people root for him.

Live Cheat

People who had cancer can still cheat.  Just because someone had a life-threatening illness doesn't make him or her a good person.  Maybe Lance Armstrong was always a scumbag.

I Have a Disabled Son

My mom called-up a restaurant, and in wanting to know more about the restaurant's accessibility, she explained she has a son with a disability.  Hearing that really hit me hard.  I used to run a lot, and very hard.  Any distance runner on the track team will tell you how hard I ran.  Now I have an aid that pushes me around in my wheelchair, and that makes me feel so humiliated.

I would use a gun to kill animals, and anybody who tried to seriously harm me. I would never shoot other people. Anybody who thinks a more strict gun-control law will prevent kids from killing other kids completely misses the point. I hate hearing how president Obama needs to enforce a more strict gun-control law, as a result the recent school shootings.

Don't Consider Me Narcistic

My posts seem pretty self-centered, and egotistical.  I don't consider myself either of those things.  Think of my posts as a "public diary".  I think of something, and then I try to put into a relatable form.  Take this entry as justification for my primarily self-centered posts.

Relativity

Relative to my life before the accident (a dual-degree holder, and a distance runner) the way I live currently seems like a "free-fall".  I can't run anymore, and I (a masters degree holder) injured my brain.  I refuse to focus on these negatives.  Relative to having a coma, my current status of living a relatively normal life seems extremely positive.  About 20 months ago I had my eyes closed for 5 weeks straight, and now I can walk with assistance.

YAY!

I often post about things that piss me off, but I want to post some things I like/love:
1.  kit cats playing with dangly things
2.  great films
3.  David Lynch
4.  Stanley Kubrick
5.  pooping
6.  peeing
7.  popping my own pimples
8.  cute cats
9.  kittens
10.  Dogs that don't give me allergies (very few exist)
11.  my kitten

My Kit Cat Writes Now

My kitten just finished a novel entitled "Friendly, but Annoying".

Incorrect II

I want to correct another mistake I made on facebook, here.  I made a mistake about the brain's structure.  I thought the brain had a similar structure to the heart, meaning if someone injured the right hemisphere of the brain (like me), that injury would also affect the left hemisphere of the brain.  If one injured the right atrium, that injury would affect the entire heart.  I injured the right hemisphere of my brain, and just like injuring the right atrium of the heart, I thought injuring the right hemisphere of the brain would affect the entire brain.  In reality, the brain has a completely different organization, in which each neuron functions independently of the other neurons of the brain, and each collection of neurons has a different role (like vision processing, thought, etc.).

"of our days, and of our nights"

I wonder if Scott Bayo appeared in anything beside Charles in Charge.

Incorrect

On facebook I wrote Speech therapy primarily taxes my brain.  With that post, I think I made an incorrect statement.  If you, personally, know me, I hate when I do something wrong.  I wouldn't forget about this supposed mistake without making this post.  I think Speech Therapy primarily taxes my lungs, which I collapsed in my accident.  A huge part of good speech comes from breath support.  I have shitty breath support now, and speaking (something we tend to take for granted) makes me very fatigued.

Mama Domino

I wanted a Pasta Bread Bowl so bad for dinner.  I only received pasta without the bread bowl.

Pronounce a Single "O" the Right Way

I've grown so tired of people pronouncing the word "Sudoku" "Sudooku" in front of me.  I just let it slide (reluctantly), because I don't feel like explaining my frustration intelligibly.

Handicapable

My perspective on people who use assistive devices (canes, walkers, etc.) has changed.  A person who uses an assistive device has had to overcome a huge challenge to reach the current status of ambulating with assistance, so one can see this person as kind of a warrior, and a hard worker.  I used to label a person using a walker as a "disabled" person.  Now, as I primarily use my wheelchair to mobilize, I have a completely different opinion on the use of assistive devices.

Old Year

When do people stop using the term "New Year"?

My Body Is a Wonderland

Human Nomenclature

I find it funny how names fall into a certain generation.  You would have a difficult time finding someone named Mildred, or Bertha under the age of 30. I'll change "under the age of 30" to "alive".

The Rule of Life

Live your life so senior women call you "sweet".

Anybody (strait females included) who respects human life must appreciate the beauty Rooney Mara conveys.

Book Review

I'll provide a book review for a book I started to read for Book Club in therapy, and then stopped reading the book once I realized how much the book sucked.  The author had a car accident in which he sustained a brain injury.  The books contains incorrect use of possessive words.  This book uses "their" to describe a situation experienced by one person.  My English teacher taught me in middle school not to do this.  Reading this made me, literally, nauseous.  The author sucks.  Most critics praise the book, because the story tells the tale of recovery from drain damage, and I suspect most people feel bad about the suffering the author had to sustain to recover from brain damage.  I have a brain injury, and I don't feel bad for no one.  The book is called Surviving Black Ice.  Don't read this book, unless you want an example of how not to write.

Ima be a baller til' the day I ball.

Dangly Things

I have often wondered about the composition of a cat's brain.  Since cats clearly have no language, how do cats think?  Why do cats run around unjustifiably?  Maybe my kitten just does that.