People seem to respect my ability to drive the bitch home.

Prepare For Complete Anihilation

As I watched the Wiscosin-LSU game last night, I couldn't stop thinking how bad Wiscosin will spank Rutgers.

Thank You...

I had dinner with some friends the other night.  One of my female friends took it upon herself to serve my other friends.  She served my one friend and he said, "Thank you, dear." One of my friends mistakenly thought he said, "Thank you, faggot."  How can you mistake "dear" for "faggot"?

I CAN'T Do Anything Humanly Possible

I have no hopes of becoming an olympic medalist.  My genetics limit my ability to win the javelin throw.  I simply cannot throw a javelin far enough to win a gold medal in this olympic event (especially in my current condition).  I would get smoked if I even entered this event.  I often say I can do anything humanly possible.  I'm exceptionally confident, but I'm also realistic.  When I say "I can do anything humanly possible," that means I just give myself more credit than most people.  I laugh to myself when I hear a person say he or she can't do something when he or she just has an extremely difficult time doing that thing.

The Top 5 Ladies In Showbiz (According to Attractiveness (From My Perspective))

1.  Beyonce Knowles (The explicit exposure of her butt in the video for Partition shows her hotness in full force.  She has a divine butt, and she has an immaculate complexion.)
2.  Scarlet Johanson (the recent revelation (to me at least) that she might have implants doesn't make much difference to me.  Her breasts still look real.)
3.  Kate Upton
4.  Hannah Ferguson
5.  Rooney Mara

We need to accept Miley Cyrus as the slut she's become instead of wishing she'd return to her innocent "Hannah Montana" days.

Like Daniel from "Karate Kid", I push it to the limit.

My Name is "Helicopter"

My friend has a friend named "Helicopter".  He told me, when she became old enough to form complex words, her parents let her name herself, and she named herself "Helicopter".

I've Really Matured

In terms of my food perception, I've vastly matured.  A couple of years ago, when someone would place down dessert in front of me, while in the midst of eating my meal, my appetite would immediately alter to desiring sweet food.  I'd immediately desire to move on from my savory meal to sweet dessert.  Currently, someone can place dessert in front of me, and I don't give a shit.  I can eat my savory meal, and I don't care too much about dessert.  I consider this behavior to be an example of living in the present, and not being anxious about the sweetness to come.  Having typed that, don't even think about making me endure a meal without terminating it with something sweet.

The fact that I act very friendly doesn't make me a push-over.

I'm Happy With My Life

Sometimes I wish I didn't have to deal with this shit (marginalization, a sensitive throat, having no ability to run) but when I start to think that, I soon realize the marginalization, the constant coughing, and the inabity to run has given me invauable perspective, and I can't think of another life I'd rather have.

My stubborn avoidance of the question, "can you please help me" seems to upset people.

I know I'm supposed to do something, but I can't remember what I'm supposed to do. This shit happens all the time. The fact that I can function in society amazes me.

I'm Sorry :(

I sincerely apologize for anything offensive I might have posted on this blog.  I don't apologize for any negativity directed at TV or the radio.  A lot of my blog posts, in which I admonish a group of people or way of life, were actually directed at a specific person, because I was too spineless to actually talk to the specific person about the problem.  I, somehow, thought this was healthy way to deal with the problems I have in my mind.  I have made the decision to stop doing this, and I'll go back through my posts and delete any post that might offend someone (except anyone on TV or on the radio).

noise pollution - the TV show "The Chew"

I CAN'T Do Some Things

My inability to play a picnic game leisurely caused me to question the belief I used to hold that I can accomplish anything humanly possible.  The other day, I went to a barbecue.  I saw people playing this beanbag-toss game (Cornhole).  I wanted to play, so I asked my friend to play the game with me.  Before we played, I took a few practice tosses.  I couldn't even REACH the target without maximal effort exerted on my part.  This phenomenon convinced me to quit.  I felt like playing a leisurely picnic game.  I was done with physical therapy for the day.  I just wanted to relax and drink iced tea, not try hard.  I can't run AND I can't play a leisurely game of Cornhole.

I'm An Inspiration

I feel pretty good about something.  My physical therapist just competed in the Ironman (in order: ~3 mile swim, 112 mile bike, marathon, all consecutively in the same event, it took him 14.5 hours to complete (crazy, right?))  He told me he wrote a list of 26 inspirational patients on his forearm to look at and inspire him for each mile during the marathon.  He wrote my name down, and I inspired him for the last mile.  Although I'm currently in a wheelchair, I'm still a runner at heart.  One day running in a marathon keeps determined, and I won't stop trying to better myself until I run 26.3 consecutive miles.

I want to make a timeline of a conversation with someone who's especially loquacious to examine the relation of the topics that the loquacious persion brings up to the original idea of the conversation.

I've developed the ability to turn any unrelated conversation into incomprehensible background noise. Unfortunately, this "skill" sometimes manifests itself when someone talks directly to me.

Depth and simplicity aren't mutually exclusive.

The efficacy of a design relies on the depth of the concept used to drive the construction of that design.

I'm conflicted. I want to think the worst about a person, but as I get to know that person, I sometimes realize he or she is actually a good person.

I use the euphemism "proactive" to justify my impulsive online purchases.

Google the word "need". Most people have an unsatisfactory understanding of this word.

I question my house-mates preference for radio music over silence on the ride to-and-fro therapy.

My stubborn desire to do things independently seems to annoy people.