What is the difference between food and foodstuff?

Can "Realtor David" be any more effeminate?

My mom proved she's smarter than 10 year olds on "Jeopardy" tonight.

I turned 8 years old on my 11th birthday.

How Did George Carlin Stay So Bitter?

George Carlin built his comedic-career on making his stand-up delivery bitter and angry.  I think once a comic reaches the pinnacle of success, like George Carlin eventually did, you'd move on from being angry, and reach a plateau of satisfaction.  I can kind of understand the bitterness George Carlin displays early in his career, because he had to struggle to achieve fame.  George Carlin had to work extremely hard to continue his angst, or maybe he was just angry by nature.  His angst comes off as very contrived when I watch his later stand-ups.

What Provokes Angst?: Do Genetics cause Bitterness, Or Did George Carlin Just Get Made Fun Of a Lot For Being Ugly?

I watch a George Carlin stand-up routine at night before I fall asleep, and most of his humor centers around hatred towards a clandestine group of businessman who "own" people.  Abraham Lincoln (I think) abolished slavery.  In America, one person can't literally own another person.  For some reason, George Carlin had a lot of built up angst.

Who's the Man?

I really respect no limit poker.  You risk money on the fact you can read other peoples' minds.  Succeding in real-money poker (fake-money poker isn't real poker, because that game has no risk involved) makes you the man.

Please, Follow Logic

I have a "Sports Illustrated" magazine in my bathroom, and, on the cover, one of the headlines states "The Strangest but Truest Story of the Summer".  If you break down the logic of this headline, you'll realize the headline makes no sense.  The statement "the Truest Story" assumes that every other story has some falsehood in it.  I have a very simple story.  In the story, I only state the laws of gravity govern humans.  The "Sports Illustrated" magazine headline states this story has a falsehood.  Acepting the "Sports Illustrated" magazine headline, the laws of gravity don't govern humans.  Then, gravity doesn't anchor one single person to the ground.  The story that goes along with headline tells a story under which gravity anchors people to the ground, and therefore the headline makes no sense.  I hate it when magazine editors don't consider logic.

I wish my parents could move on from their argument about the "Gettysburg Address". They'll probably get divorced over this.

I Dislike Organized Religion (Not Joel Osteen)

I've disrespected Joel Osteen a lot on my blog.  I don't know him personally, and I don't know enough about him to express negative emotions about him.  A lot of people seem to like him, and the only information I have on him comes through the media (an infamously unreliable source).  So basically, don't ever listen to me, when it comes to Joel Osteen.  My expressed dislike of him probably just stems from my aversion of organized religion.

I wanted Lee Westwood to win the British Open, and him being a brit. didn't matter to me.

"Stand Up Guys": starring the 2 most ridiculed actors in the world

A woman often says how she sees "sense of humor" and confidence as a huge part of what makes a man attractive. Straight males also look for a rich a personality in a female as a part of what makes a woman attractive. I very much dislike a weak personality (shyness) in a woman. Indecision turns me off so much.

Is anything created, or are "new" things just a novel rearrangement of matter?

I know I thought of an entry for this blog, but now I forget it. I wish I had a completely intact memory. I forget shit all the time.

I CAN Fix It

I have a huge problem with the terms "I need help", and "I can't".  Saying you "need help" just means you haven't actually tried.  Literally, saying you "can't" do something means you don't have the physical or mental ability to accomplish something.  Humans can't fly.  Humans don't have bodies made for flight.  Often, a person too easily says he or she can't do something when he or she just has an extremely difficult time doing that task.  The other day, I became very offended when I leaned over to my left, and a physical therapist criticized my lean, and then my personal physical therapist said, "He can't fix it."  This made me think, "Of course I can fix it.  My brain injury just sometimes causes me to lean to the left, but when I think about it, I can correct my lean."  This defeatism from my physical therapist sucks.  My physical therapist should learn to utilize my strengths, instead of pointing out the things I "can't" do.

Avoid cultivating small facial hair.

How I Really Feel

The movie "Mulholland Drive" receives way too much flack.  People just feel comfortable with linear plotlines.  I dislike movies that pretend to be original, and the movie ends up being a  piece of crap, with a recycled linear plotline, like "Vanilla Sky".

Why do I find the name "Iain" so unessecary.

You live until you die.

My wife's wedding, and my wedding took place in different churches.

One has to rely on "Grundalia Techniques" to handle most situations.

"How'd I fail Women's Studies. I love bitches."

I don't think I've seen a funnier movie than "How High".

Please boycott Eddie Murphy. He's a terrible homophobe. I already purchased one of his stand-up DVDs so I can't boycott him as much as I want to. Although I'm not a homosexual, I despise his homophobic-centered humor. I won't purchase anymore merchandise that would support him. The frequency with which he uses the word fa***t, in his stand-up "Delerious", is pathetic and horrendous.

I really do like dogs. I just wish my nostrils and eyeballs liked dogs also.

A person should welcome a loved one to tell him or her he or she smells bad.

Ask yourself one question: Is it possible to pee without pooping?

The Relativity of Chemical Balls

Relative to natural breasts, breast implants seem fake.  Implants have a physical presence.  In the sense that they have a physicality, breast implants can be perceived as "real".

I've learned at least one thing through "Game of Thrones". Peter Dinklage has taught me the difference between dwarves and midgets. Dwarves have grossly disproprotionate body parts (they have small appendages with a relatively large trunk and a relatively large head). Midgets have a proprotionate body, and they fall under a certain height. I always thought it was the other way around. Peter Dinklage is a dwarf (not a midget).

I miss my peepaw.