Ms. Wigglesworth just released her new guide for pets entitled "Coping With Hatred For Your Tail".

Why did the Girl Scouts change the name of Samoas to Caramel DeLites?

To any new readers: What the hell have you been doing with your life? Why hasn't my blog been a "staple" in your life? Without reading this, you surely have had an incomplete life. Without reading my blog, you surely haven't accomplished the necessary tasks for living. It makes me happy you have finally come around to realize the profound importance this blog has on your humanity. Let's celebrate.

Fluffin just finished a new novel entitled "I'll Eat Some Things That Don't Blend In With the Environment, and I'll Attack Others".

As a species, we must embrace the lessons we can take away from chicken.

My Aunt just finished a new novel entitled "Sweater Heat", edited by my mom.

Does anybody want join my new club called the "No Goonies Group"?

My friend just wrote a new novel entitled "Throw the Veggies Behind the Bench".

I feel kind of bad (only kind of) about singling-out Lance Armstrong.  Probably, just like Lance Armstrong has said, tons of cyclists use "performance-enhancers".  A lot of cyclists probably suck.  This doesn't change the fact he exploited cancer to build a business foundation, and to make people root for him.